Claims that you might be too blue collar for her college friends.

Won’t have their picture taken. Fears loss of soul.

Refers to their spiritual advisor as MASTER.

Has ever been abducted by an alien.

She wants you to call her “Momma”…in or out of the sack

Doesn’t remember the Challenger explosion.

Doesn’t vote.

You catch her watching porn by herself…of herself…with Ron Jeremy.

You catch him watching porn by himself…of himself…with Ron Jeremy.

Knows how to give a ‘jailhouse tattoo’.

Owns more than one Yoko Ono solo album.

Was once engaged to one of your siblings.

Has a shrine…to a TV personality.

Doesn’t see what the big deal is about stem cell research.

Has slept with your boss.

Thinks the Beatles are overrated.

Name drops.

Doesn’t know who Gerald Ford was.

Eats crackers in bed.

Eats in bed, period.

Has plan on how to land on the sun…involves going at night.

Dinner and a movie means Taco Bell and Blockbuster.

Can’t show you Utah on a map.

Roots for your college team’s arch rival.

Smokes crack…regularly.

Agrees with “some of what David Duke has to say”.

Believes in fairies

She’s already married.

Not only believes in Bigfoot, but has gone ‘Bigfoot Hunting’

He/She has ever slept with a member of the following hair metal bands: Motley Crue, Whitesnake or Poison.

Knows the guys at the counter of the local motel personally.

Works for the IRS…and likes it.

Has never seen “The Godfather”

Sends you an invoice after your first date.

Their ex is doing a ‘nickel’ up state.

Refers to their self in the third person…constantly.

Has another persons name tattooed across their neck

Uses the word 'Dude' during sex.

She is one of the undead / a zombie